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[Manicman]

I have read your article, and fit most but not all of it, including meeting Mr. Death. I am wondering when the forum, and website you have started will be up and running, because I would like to participate. I am actually the reincarnated soul of a tribal shaman, which is why I have confidence in what I am saying.
I am simply looking for someone to talk to. At the tail end of an incredibly difficult, shitty initiation. Making good progress, but struggling with forgiving myself for a self destructive incident a few years back. In fact at my last divination session with another authentic shaman, I asked the tarot cards for their parting advice and he said "It has the word forgiveness all over it." I'd be happy to give more information in confidence.

[Manicman]

Okay, I am quite pleased at the moment. Have to share somewhere. I am restoring a shamanic tradition that has been dead since the Europeans invaded North America, and doing so without many resources or much real help. The calling for my tradition hit long before I was even of the legal age of majority (9-11), the basic structure that supports the initiation doesn't actually exist in the modern world (separation, initiation, return). Had the spirits of my tradition understood things better they simply would have waited 50 or 100 years to send me in, and I still managed to salvage the damn thing!
My initiation should have ended in October 2013, but I got screwed over by the worst authentic shaman in the history of the world. This guy spent our time bragging about how awesome he is, and screwed up the one piece of information I trusted him with. It has been an incredibly difficult time; I spent years working near minimum wage jobs while badly destabilized from the spiritual forces, saving up scratch to keep pushing forward with the initiation. And my efforts are finally yielding the ego death rebirth I have been going for. I'm still going to have a ton of work to do, but the acute crisis part of the initiation is ending I think tonight.
I'm very hesitant to post the esoteric/otherworldly stuff online, but I just need to talk. Have had an absolutely awful time for many many years and finally breaking through to the other side. Thank you.

[Mystress]

  I do not feel you are a genuine shaman by my standards. You throw around the term, authentic shaman but I doubt you can identify one.

  You don't just meet death, that indicates kundalini not a shaman. The Shaman guide is a constant companion.

  I do not believe in reincarnation either.

  The term Shaman is not from north American native spirituality, they use other terms. Shaman is rooted in Nordic Europe.

   

 

[Manicman]

I know that shaman is a flawed bastardized word originally from around siberia, but I am not fussed about the language. when I was a kid I had dreams telling me I was meant to be a "keeper of the spirits." I think once you are immersed in the specifics of a tradition, the word ceases to be a big deal, but if you are struggling through the initiation, the word can be useful in connecting one to people and information.
I've had two other authentic shamans identify me as one.
I do not believe the threshold guardian you mentioned shows up for kundalini awakening.
I'm still struggling through the aforementioned initiation, due to a lack of practical resources. What I am going through properly belongs in the wilderness rather than the institutions of an individualistic modern culture.
I also disagree with your article saying that all shamans come down with a life threatening disease. There is an initiatory sickness for my tradition, but it is something very different. I've also talked to a man who went down the life threatening disease path, but he noted that in his tradition the initiation can be a prolonged bout of madness or insanity as well.
You mentioned that you have ways of detecting the spooky death vibe non locally, and I am confident I give it off. If I gave you my name via p.m. would you be willing to look into it?

[Mystress]

  I think you have decided shaman means what ever you want it to mean.

  My page on shaman awakening clearly states not to ask me if you are one, you don't seem to want to respect that. The reason why is just as you are, when I tell them "no" they want to argue with me about it and twist my definition to fit themselves and their story and discard what does not fit. Just as you are doing.

  If you disagree with so much of what I say then why does my opinion matter to you? Does not look to me like it does. You believe what you want.

[Manicman]

No you misunderstand. I am not asking you if I am one. I am already sure. I am trying to convince you that I am one so we can talk. Because I want someone to talk to. About what I have been going through for the last few years.
Your page certainly has some good information, but is not the final word on the subject. So far, many of the handful of people I have talked to on the subject will often overstate things specific to their tradition and their experiences as being universal. For example the threshold guardian you talk about (whom I have indeed met) only seems to show up for North American traditions. The two shamans I have met who are not doing North American traditions have not met Mr. Death.
Actually I am still hoping you finish the genuine shamans forum and page you started.
I realized throwing this word around can get you in trouble and offend people, but on the other hand if you genuinely have this calling on you the word is a starting point for connections that can be immensely valuable.

[Manicman]

To clarify, when I say your article is not the final word on the subject, I don't mean that disrespectfully. It's a good article that said some things I needed to hear.
Truth is, there just isn't that much authentic information out there on this subject in the first place. Which is why I am eager for someone to talk to.
I basically read whatever I can come by on the subject.

[Mystress]

I am trying to convince you that I am one so we can talk.

 So, basically you think I am flaky? That my integrity is malleable? By you? Trying to manipulate me just shows you have no idea, what it means to be a genuine shaman.  I am not a reed in the wind that will bend to your persuasion, for your convenience.  I am true to Goddess and guide, and have none before. Shaman integrity, an intense imperative to tell the truth. All genuine shamans I know, have this imperative. You think persuasion could over ride that? Seriously? Some flaky people calling themselves shamans have given you a wrong idea.

I have been through this crap too many times with wanna be shamans who want me to lie. to distort the truths I have been shown,  expand my definition to include them because their ego is attached to a label. The answer is No.

What part of "no" is not clear to you? You trying to sell me on the idea that you are a genuine shaman so you can get my attention, is ridiculous.

Only genuine shamans will get access to the forum on the GenuineShamans.org page.  People like you are the reason why. The definition is as exact and inflexible as the path itself. You don't like it, I don't care. It is what it is.  
 
 You got all these people claiming to be shamans around you, go talk to them. You think I have something they do not, maybe ask yourself, what that is.

 You know, there are many sorts of inborn magical beings with odd powers, besides Shamans.  Witches, fey, the various sorts of vampires. I can name you. Your desire for attention, your absolute self centeredness, your sense of entitlement, your disrespect of boundaries and efforts to manipulate,  plus the icy place inside you where it all comes from, marks you as untrained vampire, not shaman.

  There are similarities because vampires are the distant ancestors of shamans but vamps outnumber shamans about 300-1 with an insignificant mortality rate and few graduates. Perhaps you will be a rare one who unfolds the full potential but typically they do not mature past their self centeredness.

  Vamps have quite different experience, boundaries and skill set. The icy place inside a vamp is more hungry, predatory vibe than the Shaman death gate. I usually see it on the left side. You have to own it, pretending it does not exist just makes you a polite predator.  Find your kin among the psi vamps, learn to respect boundaries, how to heal by taking, and what to give back to keep the balance.  

For example the threshold guardian you talk about (whom I have indeed met) only seems to show up for North American traditions. The two shamans I have met who are not doing North American traditions have not met Mr. Death.

 You are quite wrong about that. I have mentored shamans in Nordic Europe, UK, USA, Canada and Austria, and they all have the portal guardian. Further I am not part of any native north American tradition, those hold no interest to me.  I was raised Christian and my perspective is partly eastern mysticism (obviously, Kundalini) some elements of western magic, emerald tablet... and the patronage of a Mexican rain God.

 Your peeps have no portal guardian then they are not shamans. Any idiot can call themselves a shaman, but that does not make them one. The point of teaching others to identify the vibe of a genuine shaman is so they can avoid the fake ones that give bad advice and will never attain the powers. The portal guardian is connected to the death gate, no guardian no gate no shaman. That's how it is.

I realized throwing this word around can get you in trouble and offend people, but on the other hand if you genuinely have this calling on you the word is a starting point for connections that can be immensely valuable.

This forum is about this Kundalini website. It is only a small part of the dozen or so websites I have, not the largest nor the busiest. I also run my Mystery school, my second life island, a handful of email discussion lists, chat events and sessions, I am currently mentoring three shamans, and managing a total of 5 forums. I have a rl retail business to attend to, books to finish writing, pages to update, podcasts to record.  This forum exists because I get more email than I can handle, trying to do an end run by sending me a long pm totally misses the point.

Yes, lots of people want to talk to me, and there are not enough hours in a day for them all. Time is the one non renewable resource. You think you are entitled to my time. I do not agree. This is all you get from me.

 Approximately 1/3 of genuine shamans do not survive to graduate. Those that do, literally go through hell and are left with an expanded consciousness and nearly non existent free will, and layers of constraints.  Those gifted, high risk folks are my calling, I will make time for them, not for you. Google psychic vampires, find your kin. Give up trying to snack on me.  

[Manicman]

Look disagreeing with you and still wanting to talk isn't proof of entitlement issues, and it is certainly not proof of being a psychic vampire.
I believe that the Mexican tradition you write about being initiated into is a North American tradition.
The opinions I previously expressed are anecdotal. I have met three people in my current life I would describe as authentic shamans. And communicated with a few more online. In addition to that, I do have past lives in my tradition, and have some (not complete) conscious access to those memories. So far those I have communicated with who are doing North American traditions have met said threshold guardians, and the others have not. But I will state explicitly I do not consider myself anywhere close to the final word on the subject, just as I don't consider your article the final word on the subject.

I understand where your skepticism comes from, but I am confident that if you were to look into my system non locally, which you claim you can do, you will find that yes I do give off the creepy death vibe associated with the  gate to the underworld. I have first hand experience with it, and while it makes perfect sense to disbelieve in the claimed experience of a stranger on the internet, that shouldn't necessarily lead to the assumption that the stranger on the internet is a psychic vampire or an entitled prick.

Honestly the fact that you would equate manipulation and an honest difference of opinion leads me to believe you are a bit self righteous and stuck up. Which was the opinion of one of the other shamans whom I talk to when I showed him bits of your website.

Of course at some point it does have to come back to first hand experience. I am confident that if you looked at my system, you would find said energetic markings. I grew up with the dreams about Mr. Death that you mentioned. And frankly I remember my past lives as a tribal shaman. And my spirits say I am one. But without some first hand experience, I understand how it would be easy to dismiss me as a stranger blowing hot air over the internet. Anyone can say anything.
I think you have an element of egotism about some of what you write (not necessarily a bad thing, I dislike ego bashers) but I think you are what you claim to be. A realized being, and an authentic shaman. Hence my desire to talk with you at greater length.
You can tell me no, but if you tell me that asking is a sign of character defect on my part, then I am going to object to that.

[Manicman]

And I am at the tail end of the severe life threatening sickness/crisis that you write about. So don't assume I just want to feel oh so special. Like I said, it's somewhat different for my tradition, but there are many similarities, and I have met Mr. Death, and could easily have not survived the past few years.
When I was in Peru doing the bulk of my initiation, the spirits of my tradition said to me, "Nice job, we thought you were going to die."
It's just that the initiatory sickness, and the initiation are somewhat different for my tradition, but it is radical, and somewhat dangerous. Happy to say more if you admit the possibility that you might not be the final word on the subject.

[Mystress]

Look disagreeing with you and still wanting to talk isn't proof of entitlement issues,

My private consultation rate is $200. per hour, and I am only available to my FST students after they have studied 20 weeks. I do make time for shamans I encounter, you are not one. You want my time anyway. Entitlement. You are not part of my calling. If Goddess and guide told me to mentor you, or have that talk with you,  then I would, and they don't. They are perfectly fine with me repeatedly kicking you to the curb and telling you go bark up some other tree.  That is what I have been doing with every response.

Is there even a clue stick big enough to get through to you?  You are persistently  refusing to listen to my repeated NO, and in case you had not noticed, vamp in denial, that's the modern definition of predator. Used to be the definition of salesman, either way you won't get what you want from me.

I believe that the Mexican tradition you write about being initiated into is a North American tradition.

  There is no tradition!!! Hello! Enough with the bullshit projections, already. The guide is central and the guide may take us in ANY direction. Many years of experience mentoring many different Shamans made shared experiences more apparent, recognizable patterns and abilities appearing, phenomena observed.  Not imposed by any person or cultural traditions. You just don't get it, We must become nothing. The guide guides, we follow or die.   Guide would blow up anything imposed externally or culturally if it limits the inborn pattern unfolding, and does blow up anything we attach to.  There is no tradition and there cannot be a tradition. Only what is inborn.

I understand where your skepticism comes from

Its clear you do not understand anything about me. Stop projecting this smug bullshit. It feels like a hailstorm. If you were a genuine shaman your guide would be kicking your ass for this behavior, it is more evidence you are not one.

but I am confident that if you were to look into my system non locally, which you claim you can do, you will find that yes I do give off the creepy death vibe associated with the  gate to the underworld.

  I did! Doh! Why you keep assuming I did not look? Because I do not agree? Your so called confidence is just rudeness at this point. I know my calling and it doesn't flicker an interest in you. If you take your head out of your ass long enough to actually listen for a moment you might remember I said you have the vamp mark not the shaman mark.

I think you have an element of egotism about some of what you write

I am a hell on wheels bitch who does not suffer fools glady. I am responding to you out of politeness because you are posting to my forum, but its worn out. You want to talk with me, so do a lot of people. Tough luck, I have no interest in talking to you.

[Manicman]

I really don't understand what to make of the second paragraph which says there is no tradition and whatnot, but yes as for the rest it simply comes down to a lack of common experience and radically different opinion.
My guides are quite okay with me questioning self proclaimed higher authorities whose definition of wise, proper spiritual behavior inevitably involved deferring to them.
I've met a handful of shamans with active and recognizable practices who agree with me that I am one, and I am quite confident I have integrated with aforementioned creepy death vibe having experienced it firsthand. Don't know what to make about the vamp accusations, but yes at this point, without making it personal, I frankly disagree with most of what you have written and doubt the quality of the long distance "check" you did on me. Not the first time I have taken issue with someone's claims to non local abilities either. Oh God I had the worst experience with non local divination in late 2013.
Obviously over the internet there is no way to definitively prove this either way, and it is your forum. But I am confident that I am not just a shaman, but the reincarnated soul of tribal shaman, because I remember my past lives of spiritual service.
In my P.M. to you I gave you my name and the tradition I claim to be being initiated into, and I'm wondering if that could help the "check."
But as I have said, there is really no definitive way to prove or disprove anything over the internet, and it is your forum so you get to lay claim to the position of higher authority.
I think my name will show up a few years down the line though. I have a lot I intend to do. Smiley face.

[CorvusShaman]

Dear Manicman,

I am one of the shamans Mystress is mentoring and I am from Europe. I have read your posts and I have checked on you:

Hey - you are lucky – you do not have the Deathgate  nor the vibe. This is good news for you as a mind-set "I have a lot I intend to do." would kill you if you would be a genuine shaman.

A genuine shaman strictly follows the guide in order to be nothing, otherwise the chance to survive the training are close to nothing. I really wonder why someone wants to be a genuine shaman (I did not) – your free will and limited believes become a lethal weapon and every trace of fear turns into a deadly projectile ... until you surrender all. The reward: more service


What I have seen in you is a lot of chi power (free will based magic) – and the ability to be emphatic but your mind is very much blocked. Make the effort find yourself first – before you jump into a role. Regular grounding will help you (http://kundalini-teacher.com/meditations/grounding.php) and test your guides (http://kundalini-teacher.com/guidance.php).

We always have the choice if its heaven or hell. Just let it go and surrender (http://kundalini-teacher.com/karma/surrender.php?searchresult=1&sstring=surrender) the idea of being a shaman and see what returns and surrender that...etc.
Well, I do not question your unconsciousness might have given you the idea of a past life as shaman for a reason – maybe to post here.

Really - if you have let it go – check the answers from Mystress to your post again – she is very honest and she gave you already a lot of very valuable information about you for free.  There might be no other place where you will be able to find a spiritual teacher who tells you about your true nature as vampire (btw there a quite cool and magical too ... e.g. healing).

You can just win if you just give back to God (or who you have faith in) all you have created and it will free your mind. 

All the best for your journey

Corvus Shaman

[Manicman]

Frankly at this point, I doubt the validity of the long distance check. Would it help if I gave you my name and tradition over p.m?
Obviously there is no way to prove it over the internet, but I am confident, and this isn't the first time I have disagreed with long distance spirit work.
Part of what I am saying is that I am aware of the fact that it is a difficult dangerous path not to be used to feed one's ego. I am in fact at the tail end of a life threatening crisis, just a somewhat different one than what she describes on her page. I'm willing to describe the details over p.m. though if you don't wish to continue that's fine. I also have met a few people I would describe as authentic shamans who agree with me in essence, one of whom did go through the life threatening illness she describes. Again I am willing to p.m. if you like.
Doesn't seem like there is much more to say. I don't mean to be unpleasant by disagreeing, but I do have the right to disagree.

[Mystress]

  People claiming to be genuine shamans tell you that you are one too so you believe them. To me they are not genuine shamans so their opinions are irrelevant.

 You can start a club for people claiming to be a three headed rhinoceros too, and people in the club can validate to each other that they are all three headed rhinos but it doesn't mean a damn thing in the real world does it? Shared fantasy. Same as you and your so-called shaman friends.

 I have been doing remote work and perceptions since I was a teenager. I am 51 now. I don't need a name, photo, location, anything. Someone can ask me to look at their co worker or their mom's third cousin anywhere on the planet, and Goddess knows who they are talking about, and She does not make mistakes.  You prefer to doubt my ability so you can hang onto this ego idea of yourself. It is laughable.

 If you were a genuine shaman the guide would be kicking your ass into next year at the idea of discarding an entire branch of psychic ability so you can coddle your ego and hold onto your illusions. So be it, lol! You handicap yourself with it, no one else. The belief will close your third eye because Free Will is Goddess law.

 I will mention though, I have encountered people, wanna be shamans who tried to steal power from me out of envy and they went nuts with zen madness. Death gate energy in a non shaman makes paranoid psychosis, there is a good reason why genuine shamans are trained and shaped from infancy to learn to deal. It is part of our natural immune system for any trace of fear to become magnified, multiplied to a volume that cannot be ignored... it precedes the cold that leads to death.

  Did you ever think your bad experiences maybe had nothing to do with a shaman path and everything to do with your pretentions opening doors better left closed? Rhetorical question. Fools rush in.  

[Manicman]

You're basically saying "It is what I say it is because I say it is." I hate it when people argue this way.
There is a book I read after an experience with an abusive guru which took issue with with authoritarianism, especially in the sphere of spiritual seeking.
It made an important point. It said "Confidence is not the nature of authoritarianism, unchallengeability is."
To say "I am confident in my abilities, and if you disagree with me there doesn't seem to be a point in us working together," is a very different stance than, "I am right by definition, and if you disagree it is a sign of defective character on your part."
You do somewhat cross the line into the latter.
My guides are quite okay with me questioning people claiming to all sorts of things within the spiritual realm. I have talked to them about it. And I've yet to meet anyone really spiritually accomplished who feels the need to insult people who doubt them. In my opinion the people who are really good are usually too busy actually doing their work to even talk about how good they are. I'm not doubting the possibility of remote psychic perception, but I have yet to meet someone who has gotten it right. In fairness I have seen people be incompetent in person as well. I actually think genuine high quality spirit work is just pretty rare. Yes, I continue to doubt you.
The people I have met who have recognized me as a shaman are in recognizable positions of service, and do have some abilities I have seen first hand. I believe myself to have experienced the cold creepy death gate you describe so well. And I remember my past lives of service to a tribe. Hence my confidence.
Obviously over the internet it is all anecdotal. No one can prove anything one way or another, though I have offered to give you more specifics over P.M. There doesn't seem to be much point to continuing this conversation given the lack of proof one way or another. I was simply hoping to talk about my feelings (It's been hard!) rather than engage in a pissing contest, but now that we are in a pissing contest, I intend to make a name for myself and eventually come back and loudly gloat on this forum. That is, if I am not too busy actually doing my damn job.

[Mystress]

  Laughs.
  You set up the pissing contest, leaning on your network of he said and she said, and refusing to listen. I dont care what they said. You got issues with vampires? I never said it was a bad thing, I know some cool vampires.  You think your character is without defect? Look at the dented ego saying it will come back to taunt me lol. Seriously? Childish.

  The term Shaman came out of nordic europe, way north the people of the reindeer, the madness of the long nights and the shrooms. It is a genetic adaptation. The norse took sami wives and their sons fucked their way across europe and into asia, some say as far south in the Americas as Mexico but mostly the coastal natives were too hostile. 

  There are other cultures who evolved various spiritual abilities and they have their own terms, and it is respectful to call them for what they are, kahunas, medicine men etc than to try to label them all with the same brush and then try to insist you are right about it. The guide and death gate marks a genuine shaman, with the gene of the far north.  You are either born with it, or not.

  and yes what I have been telling you all along is I am busy and don't have time to listen to wanna be shamans who do not know how to listen, themselves. Talking @ me not to me. I am responding out of politeness only and am really past being polite at this point. 

  Yes, go elsewhere, what I have been saying...

 

[Manicman]

I hate the game of "You're egotistical; no you're egotistical!"
We all have egos (except for Buddha I suppose), the point is to have some capacity to get beyond it, so that it does not compel you to do stupid things, such as display blatant contempt for people simply for disagreeing with you.
"I am a hell on wheels bitch who does not suffer fools glady." As though this sort of thing is a pinnacle of enlightened behavior but "There is a lot I intend to do" is a sign of arrogance.

I already mentioned that shaman is not the word for my tradition. When I was a child I had dreams telling me I was meant to be a "Keeper of the Spirits." I think it is a flawed but useful word, because it can help with connections and information during the crisis of initiation. I have the guide and death gate, could tell you about some of the forms the guide took in my dreams as a child. Though I have talked to some people I consider authentic shamans who do not.
I also disagree with your article saying that the "shaman sickness" always takes the form of a life threatening physical illness. I have met a man who did indeed go down that route who notes that in his tradition there are other "roads" for the potential shaman to go down. In my tradition there is a shaman sickness, but it is entirely different, though it is still a sickness that forces one to become a shaman.
Your student says: "This is good news for you as a mind-set "I have a lot I intend to do." would kill you if you would be a genuine shaman."
This is melodramatic nonsense. It is true that the path has dangers, and initiation can be fatal, but a mindset is not going to kill you.
Actually a lot of your descriptions of what it is to be an authentic shaman have elements of accuracy but are also quite melodramatic, which was the opinion another shaman I talked to had of you. And by saying this, yes I am implying I trust my sources more than yours. At some point it does have to come back to first hand experience, and I have met people who have greater credentials than New Age Guru, which doesn't impress me much.
I was previously willing to give names and details of what I have been talking about, but you don't seem at all open to the idea that your decades in the New Age Scene don't qualify you as the final word on the subject. I am quite willing to discontinue this conversation, but someone had to point out the fact that the information you have put up is not totally true, and you are not the final word on this subject.

[Manicman]

I could say a bunch of mean things here, but it seems more appropriate to mention this for both of our consideration:
link
Sorry about how bulky the link is, but it's very true. What you don't seem to realize, what I have run into before in online conversations, is that as much as I am an internet stranger of questionable credibility to you, you are an internet stranger of questionable credibility to me. I offered to private message you the recognizable) names of some of those I worked with, and many other relevant details, which was a stab at making this more concrete. You aren't interested, fine. We're just going around in circles, because as I keep mentioning, there is no way to prove anything without first hand experience. I trust my sources more than you, and frankly I remember my past lives as a tribal shaman. I do believe you to be an authentic shaman, but don't think that you are necessarily a highly accomplished one, and "New Age Guru" doesn't mean anything to me.
And of course, you think I am full of shit, and a psychic vampire. Fine. How can I disprove this over the internet? My spirits have told me to not continue talking with you, so therefore this will be my last comment.

[Mystress]

 Feel some folks wondering why I refused to deal with this guy. It is because the health of my liver matters more to me than dealing with idiots.  

 Empathic healing relies on receptivity. White magic is defined by consensuality. I am very empathic so I tend to take on stuff from people I work with. If someone is resistant, then there is no consensuality and the white magic turns black, toxic and physically attacks the organs of cleansing, kidneys, liver. Liver disease is rampant among some types of healing professions such as massage therapists, gurus, chiropractors, any activity that releases tension/karma stuff from the body.  

 I once had a great chiropractor. I was concerned about the stuff he was taking on, gave him a little demo of removing it and asked to take him to lunch to train him how to clean his energy. He declined. A year later he was in hospital getting surgery for liver damage and last I heard he is a real estate agent now.

 If I damage my health tending to one arrogant ass who wants to argue, then I would not be available to the sincere seekers who are receptive. That is not good for anyone.

 I did not attain by being willing to compromise the spiritual truths Goddess has given me to coddle some arrogant ego. I am not here to coddle egos or validate BS. My spiritual power is connected to my integrity of thought, word and deed. As a Shaman it is taboo for me to lie so I could not validate BS even if I wanted to.

 As it happens, I have a calling to train vampires that is connected to my calling to mentor shamans but he was entirely unreceptive to that idea too!  At least he finally took my repeated advice to go bark up some other tree... even if he did think it was his own idea.

 

[Manicman]

Actually I stopped checking cause it was an old thread.
I happened to re-check to see if people had posted other interesting things on the forum.
I will restate: Your argument basically goes "It is what I say it is because I say it is."
I'm not obligated to defer to you just because it is your internet forum. New Age Guru and the self proclaimed title "Mystress" also don't mean anything to me.
I actually do think you are authentic shaman. There is real information in some of your writings. I don't assume you are a good one. There is also a lot of haughtiness and melodrama.
For example the assertions that shamans drop dead due to the attitude of "There is a lot I intend to do." What?
Or the assertion that you will suffer from health problems due to unpleasant internet arguments. These are both utterly ridiculous, and just a way of trying to objectify your own haughtiness as indisputable spiritual truths. Which is actually the impression of another shaman I shared your writings with. The subtext is pretty clear.
When I first posted, I was basically looking to vent and maybe receive some sympathy. I am 100 percent confident of the reality of my experiences, and will not back down just because a self appointed authority calls me a psychic vampire on the internet.
I am also aware of the fact that people who are 100 percent confident are often wrong, and others aren't obligated to defer to them. See? It goes both ways.
Ultimately expertise is based on shared experience and "What can you show for it?". I had hoped to give you more specific information in P.M. You weren't up for it. Fine.
But cut the bullshit Angie. You need to take some courses in logic, rhetoric, and discourse before expecting other people to believe that you're a personal embodiment of the will of goddess. Disagreeing with your "expert" opinion isn't proof of a character defect on my part, because your "expert" opinion isn't objective reality.
This sort of authoritarianism is why sane people dislike gurus. I've been doing this longer than you. I've met people who have been doing this longer than you who agree with me, at least in generalities. Coming back a year later and saying "I win! Haha!" doesn't actually prove anything.

[Manicman]

If you don't want me to continue rebutting your nonsense, you better ban me from your forum.
Because spiritual initiations aside, I seem to be the one who actually understands logic and intellectual rigor.

[Manicman]

Another interesting thought. Angie said to open her most recent post:
"Feel some folks wondering why I refused to deal with this guy."
Okay. She is claiming she has enough psychic receptivity or intuition to "feel" that other people wanted her to give closure on this year old thread.
Can any of those people on this forum step forward to validate what she said? I mean if she is that good, other people should be able to corroborate it right? Who was actually thinking, "Please Mystress, address why you are no longer commenting on this argument."?
Anyone?
Anyone?
Cause the other interpretation is that she, yet again, used her claims to spiritual powers and authority as an excuse to publicly proclaim her own importance and infallability. That she wanted an excuse to go back and say "Look at this idiot. I win, I win!" a full YEAR after the argument was over.
Maybe Angie is just insecure.

[Duu]

Hello,
There is lots of people here that can see in split second what they need to see.
I see a young man with unconscious part screaming for help and his conscious part spewing nonsense here and in life.
But really purely the words you wrote here it's sufficient. Help can not be given to a resisting person even if need is dire and solution simple. And showing a disrespect to a teacher gets you just shit points.

Duu

[Manicman]

Please use proper grammar before claiming superior insight and personal wisdom. Also, go back over what I said. Maybe it seems like nonsense to someone as incoherent as you, but if I bring in someone from outside this subculture, who doesn't accept the deeper wisdom of self styled internet gurus, I think they are likely to agree that I have a point here.
Once again, there is no actual rebuttal. Just "He disagreed! What a flawed, arrogant person!"
Ugh. I probably shouldn't have been looking for a serious conversation on an internet forum. But in fairness to me, I was quite insane when I posted that, due to aformentioned shamanic initiation. It's still going on, but I have nearly closed the book on the dangerous part.
Once again, I DO NOT ACCEPT THAT MYSTRESS HAS GENUINE WISDOM OR SUBSTANTIAL SPIRITUAL POWERS. I NEVER WANTED TO BE HER STUDENT. ME DISAGREEING WITH HER DOESN'T INDICATE ARROGANCE ON MY PART BECAUSE I DO NOT EXIST RELATIVE TO HER. HAVING SEVERAL ONLINE SITES IS NOT A CLAIM TO AUTHORITY. PLEASE REFLECT ON THIS BEFORE TRYING TO DISPARAGE ME WITH SELF RIGHTEOUS NONSENSE.