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[Da Zues Mon]

prior to my spontaneous kundalini awakening at the age of maybe 15-16(which wasn't too long ago considering i just turned 18),i was engaging regularly in meditation and yoga. After my awakening, i had to stop meditating and eat a heavier diet and try to become "normal" again, since i had lost contact with my guide and had no clue as to what kundalini was, i just thought that i was going crazy too. But now that i've done more research on, not only kundalini, but also on my self and my demons, i am more aware of the nature of the circumstance. i want to begin meditating and grounding myself again but ever since my awakening its been so hard to break myself into it again. and every time i seem to actually try and ground myself and acquire energy, what im surrounded by(school, work, unconscious vamps, etc.) just feels like it drains me of all that i worked for and i find myself straying from the practice more and more and seeking external closure and pleasures.But i guess its through the awareness of the pain that i can see my demons to open my heart to them accept that its a part of me that i create...