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[nodgie]

My Knndalini  is rising. I had a shit day today... and a shit life...

In the last 5 minutes it started suddenly. My head is finally starting to melt away all the stones that have een in there for so long.....

I am alone in bed and the extacy im feeling now is so freaking amazing!!!

I'll post an update later!!!!

[Jeff]

Congratulations!  It is a wonderful journey.

[nodgie]

Actually that was a false alarm.



Feeling kinda faded away after 20 minutes


still I feel I might get it back soon......

[nodgie]

Ok , Im confused now.

It was nearly a week since that first post and since then I haven't had that feeling of euphoria again. 

It felt like the first time I took ecstacy (the drug) which was about 10 years ago.. except this time there were no drugs in my system. I NEED to have this feeling back. All I have now is the usual feeling of tension throughout my head and neck muscles/nerves.

Does this spontaneous "clearing" of the tension in my body ever happen? I'm beginning to lose hope... I feel like my life will go nowhere until I have this sudden quantum leap in my life, attitude, outlook, physical posture, etc etc.

Note: When I had that amazing experience a few days ago I felt an intense warmth around my neck/lower cranium. I hope to God someone will reply and tell me they've had a similar experience.

Peace...

[Jeff]

For me, it started as random episodes that were triggered by music or emotional events.  Over a period of years it has grown to the point where it triggered by calming my mind/meditation.

Regards.

[nodgie]

Thanks Jeff

I can identify with that to an extent. I find if I "lose myself" in something this amazing feeling comes to me.

The "focal point" is the rear of my head very near the top.

I remember about 4 years ago when I started to first discover the whole kundalini thing, All the tension was concentrated in my lower back and I remember, as I sat on a bus, thinking "I have to move all this tension up my body, gradually, over the next months and years, until eventually it escapes out my head"

One difference between the "me" of back then and the "me" of today is these days my moods shift much, much faster. Back then I'd have days "on" and days "off"

[Mystress]

Thanks Jeff

I can identify with that to an extent. I find if I "lose myself" in something this amazing feeling comes to me.
<...>

One difference between the "me" of back then and the "me" of today is these days my moods shift much, much faster. Back then I'd have days "on" and days "off"

   Of course, when you lose yourself in something, ego disappears and Goddess is Present.  Its a state of surrender.

   Emotions pass through you more freely, that is good.  A good slow awakening, often there are a few peak experiences a year for the first few, and lots of silence.  Trying to push it to go faster is no good because its ego wanting and Goddess takes a hike.

   Blessings...

[aindriu]

nodgie, get Shaktipat at dyc.org
Shakti will take care of you, oh what a joy. 

After years of physically abusing myself, I was thrown into a period of half a year of solitude, on my own mostly. Looking back over it, I was forced into a deep introspection, at the time, I felt at that time, it was a great depression.

I received two shaktipat awakening episodes surging from the top-downwards. I'm not sure what the definition of this is. I'm not sure how one can bestow such blessings, but I am grateful that it is possible. The third energy surge was a day afterwards. After reading a website of service to humanity about a feminine energy entering creation, I cried, and a sudden surge of energy, different than the other two, flooded my body, vibrating all the cells.

My reality changed for a while, and was thrown into deep confusion, paranio and all the symtpoms. No doubt the reaction was to my own physical abuse over the years, so I needed to take a serious look at my life the last few days.

This all happened a few months ago. I am still trying to find the space to accept this as a blessing. Sometimes, I have deep doubts with what I went through, as I if I made it all up, especially when I relate my experience to others. I am still amid confusion, and I still pray for clarity.

I felt God had truly forsaken me, but over the last while, I am building faith.

I also had these euphoria sensations for years. They arise with music and what not, and can be great joy.

Last week, a deep, deep peace arose for an hour, from within, emanating from the heart... where clarity was seen and the flow of life was entered.

Sometimes, I long for these peak experiences, as mostly I feel very shitty all the time too. I think it'll be some time and a lot of personal work, before those blessings are bestowed on me, and I see these as an incentive I am going in the correct direction.