How can I help my 10yr old son ?

[SabrinaWakefield]

Hi there,

just wondered if you could give some advice. My son is a very special child, very sensitive, very emotional, has got light auditory problems but is very good at piano and arts. Whilst he really feels for kids at school that are not liked, he also very strongly expresses his own emotions if hurt, e.g. shows that he is sad or hurt. This in turn results in kids being hurtful even more. He's always been relying on perhaps one or two friends at school, and since he has not got any at the moment, he says he hates himself, doesn't want to go to school any more, etc.  He has lovely friends outside of school, and is liked by many. He is recognised at school for his musical and arts skills, but this is about it. On a more spiritual level, I don't know what I could do to help him......not sure whether this is the right forum but perhaps there is a source somewhere that you could point me to ? He once told me he did see spirits in our old house, that happened a number of times, but not sure whether he made this up..

All the best, Sabrina

[Mystress]

  No, not really the right forum but thats ok. He sounds like me as a kid...

  - teach him to get grounded.. it is safe for children, then teach him to let the hurtful stuff flow out the top of his head, the sad and angry emotions.

  - tell him to deal with the stuff the other kids dump by imagining he is transparent... not invisible, but like a cloud or smoke, the nastiness passes right through him like an arrow through mist.

  - most important, and most difficult: try to give him a sense of perspective.  Have him look back on how different things were when he was 4, and 6, and 8... and tell him things will be even more different as he gets older.  Time passes slowly for children, and fast for adults... the older you get the faster it goes! Have him think ahead to when he is grown up...

- get him some social skills training. Artistic sensitive goes with ADD and difficulty with social skills. Not saying he is ADD... not my call but it is always more difficult for the senstive and a little bit of charm school will go a long way in helping him adjust, otherwise it is likely to get worse as he gets older, especially hitting the teen years.

  - there are some really good resources out for helping kids learn to deal with verbal abuse and bullying. Bring some good books home, and look in your local community center for classes and events.

  - consider giving him so martial arts training, to help his poise and confidence. Kung fu in particular has a mystical focus that will help him learn to be more centered, and will probably impress the other kids with his coolness!

   Hope it helps! Blessings...

[SabrinaWakefield]

Mystress,

thanks so much for your good advice. Funny you said this about martial arts, he's been doing Wing Tsun Kung Fuh for 6 months already......

Thanks, Sabrina