Lost and in need of help

[melodicvibrations]

I apologize if this is hard to read - this is the first time in months that I've been able to concentrate long enough to write something like this.


I'm hoping someone here can offer some advice or a place to turn, I came across this site by "accident". 
I've been struggling with what I now know as Kundalini induced symptoms for the past 2 years, and to keep things simple I'm really struggling with the issue of trapped or stuck energy in my head/forehead area, and just fatigue so bad I have been unable to work in 2 years, and just overall the release of past issues that "come up" into my consciousness until they somehow release themselves.  I have seen medical doctors etc all to be told there is nothing wrong with me.  Having family turn your back on you because of this is a nice side effect.

    It started out when I was in a really bad spot a few years back and I turned to meditation, I felt like it "fixed" everything – until one night my head exploded with a crystalline blue light and after that I've been experiencing most of the Kundalini symptoms listed on El Collies website – it started with extreme third eye pressure, after the third eye "popped" a few times the crown stuff started.  I can see aura's quite vividly now, but that's about all that's changed perception wise.  I've tired the Grounding visualization on this website and it did make me feel "different" and added a new kind of "flowing" feeling going up the spine (in addition to what was already there), but I cannot seem to open my Crown chakra to let this trapped energy out (if that's what the problem is).  The head pressure seems to be the most intense after I feel the base of my spine vibrating/releasing flowing energy.   I have tried all kinds of audio Chakra balancing, visualization etc.
If anyone has any ideas I would be more than grateful, not being able to work is just hell.  This "presence" doesn't seem to be doing anything but making life a living hell.  As someone who suffered from obsessive thinking for a long time it is very hard to be non resistant.

Thanks to anyone who took the time to read this

[Sigmund]

Hello, melodicvibrations.  A couple of things come to mind.  Surrender to (we like Goddess) for one thing.  As often as necessary for blocks or suspected blocks.  Reversing resistance also comes to mind.   I'd think that would help with opening the crown.  When you ground, are you seeing the ends of the grounding "cord" attached to the center of the sun above and the earth below?  Also, you can focus the grounding on spots in your body and it'll dissolve blocks. 

  Blessings.

[melodicvibrations]

Thank you for your reply,
Can you explain more on how you would reverse resistance? I think what is holding me back the most is that I can't seem to get beyond the belief that consciousness is in the brain. 

[Sigmund]

Surrender your thoughts about where consciousness is, first of all.  Putting what you think on top of what is only gets in the way. 

You might want to put your attention at each of the chakras and see how things look/feel in each one.

As far as reversing resistance, you can do that as part of surrender or/and grounding and breathing normally.

[melodicvibrations]

Surrender your thoughts about where consciousness is, first of all.  Putting what you think on top of what is only gets in the way. 

You might want to put your attention at each of the chakras and see how things look/feel in each one.

As far as reversing resistance, you can do that as part of surrender or/and grounding and breathing normally.

Thanks.  As far as the Chakra's go, the closest I can get to "feeling them out" is too put on an album like Chakra Chants or Chakra Suite and see which tracks feel like they resonate with me. 

[infinity]

when I had a supremely heavy feeling in my head I lay on the grass, face down, arms out and let mother earth envelop me and the feeling was expelled/dissipated. i reckon try that, it couldn't hurt?