Projections... and advice for empaths.
Much is said in spiritual communities of projections, attachments and judgments, but these are seldom really explained.
It is a spiritual truth that all you can see, is yourself reflected. It is a spiritual truth that You, your Divine Self is All that Is. That on the higer dimensions, through Spirit, we are all One being.
So, if you have a judgment about someone, you are looking in a mirror. It is not about them, it is about you. Clean up your own backyard...
They are reflecting something you like or do not like, about yourself. The ego is what we think we are, the Shadow is what we think we are not: the stuff about ourselves that we deny or don't like, what is rejected and repressed, gets projected onto others.
Science tells us that everything is already made of light. E=MC2 If you see something that you think is not light, then your eyes have it wrong. Your perception, that cannot see into the infrared, ultraviolet. You are seeing your ego opinion.
Acting on your ego opinions creates karma that gets you beat up.
If you are judging that someone is in need, then likely you are not seeing them as the Divine manifest. Remind yourself, "Namaste". The Divine in you meets the Divine in them and recognises the Unity. Affirming their Divinity is more positive than projecting need onto them. When you do this, you will find that Goddess speaks to you, through them. Between the lines, between the words. ... and sometimes straight out loud, direct! Synchronicity increases.
Most often the cause of unwanted empathy is projections on the part of the empath. On an unconscious level, everyone is perfectly empathic and telepathic. So, when you are thinking negative thoughts about someone, some part of them, can hear you! How do you think they would react, if you said it to their face, out loud?
It is because of ego that most people do not have conscious access to their ESP and intuition. Their unconscious hears you, feels the energy you are sending and reacts to defend and protect itself from your projection, just as they probably would if you said it to their face, but it comes as energy and emotional baggage being dumped onto you... your own baggage coming back, multiplied.
So if you are walking around thinking about how unenlightened people really suck, or whatever your bitch is that day, then you are broadcasting that message to everyone within range, and sending it out into the universe like a prayer. What you put out comes back multiplied.
That, is where the unwanted empathy comes from. Just that. Simple!
Projecting your emotions and judgments is like a projectile, a bullet, and do not be surprised if the universe shoots back! You may get the unconscious negative emotions your projections stirred up, coming back multiplied to be dumped on your head like instant karma. I find that to be 90% of the underlying cause when people are struggling with really bad excessive empathy. Thou art God, it is self created... which is good news because it means you can do something about it by changing your attitude.
The tortured empaths are often gentle, typical "new Age" folks who were told that projecting "love and light" onto people is a good thing! It is not, it can really lead to a bumpy road. Do not broadcast love and light at other people, because judging them as being in need of it, is a negative projection. It is a pedestal, an attitude of superiority. Patronizing. It is not the same as seeing "thou art God". Namaste.
Everyone has their own definition of what love is, what Spirit is, what enlightenment looks like... so projecting your own definitions onto other people gets you into an energy argument, like all the Holy Wars of human history. From a spiritual viewpoint, it is like those preachers who ring your doorbell and get you out of bed because they think you are a sinner and want to "save" you... except, they are at least up front about it!
"It is better to be violent, if there is violence in our hearts, than to put on the cloak of nonviolence to cover impotence."
Mamma said "If you cannot say something nice, then say nothing at all." She did not mention about thoughts that are not-nice... better to think nothing at all... or, at least recognize that your judgments apply to you, most of all.
There is a very cool teacher named Byron Katie, who says to go ahead and make the judgments, judgments are natural, human... but turn them around. What you say about another, is how you feel about yourself. Recognize it, and use your judgments for self knowledge. If you turn them inward in this way, they will not be projectiles to other people, and you will grow.
To get past unwanted empathy, stop projecting, and turn inward. Do not send energy to anyone, unless you have their conscious, verbal or written consent.
If you do take on someone's stuff, consider whether it is a Divine invitation for Karma Yoga: the Boddhisatva principle of taking on the karma of others as a spiritual service. Sometimes it may be, but remember that a Boddhisattva must live in duality, to think anything needs saving, in the first place.
Stuff you take on from others, sometimes may get stuck in you because you cannot process it. Goddess won't take it, if it is not yours to give... and a horizontal "return to sender" is still a projection, their stuff incoming may feel to the recpient, like a psychic attack, especially if your frustration is added to the package.
If you have to send something back, do it vertically. "Goddess please take this stuff that is not mine, and give it back to whoever it belongs to, as You think best. Thank you very much." Goddess can then choose to hand it back to them as an insight, an experience, even an unexpected gift or bonus.
Don't use your ESP to spy on people, even if they are good friends... unless they have made it clear on words out loud that they are OK with your doing that, or unless they are your own children under the age of majority. Anything else... a psychic peeping tom is still a peeping tom. It is an invasion of boundaries.
I know, it can seem very innocent to "check in" on someone to see how they are doing... but that is what telephones and mail are for. Imagine if your best friend got in the habit of showing up to "check in" unexpectedly, no matter where you are or what you are doing? If they could materialize in your bathroom, or bedroom whenever they felt like it, without knocking or asking you if it was OK? Being respectful of the privacy of others is even more important, if you are psychic.
You may notice, that unwanted empathy often gives you a belly ache. That belly ache is your own power chakra sending you a "karma alarm." It means "Don't do that!" It is a body wisdom signal, telling you that you are not being respectful of someone's boundaries. It is your own projectile ricocheting karma like a punch in the gut.
On the higher chakras we are all one, but we have a full set of chakras, and the lower ones deal with duality, and have more to do with day to day life in the world. The difference between karma and dharma, is often about whether your actions are respectful of the individual free will of other people. We live in the world of non-duality, where there are personal boundaries, individuality and free will. Just because we are all One, does not mean we are all the same! If you do something that is not respectful of the free will and boundaries of another... like bombing them with *your* definition of love and light... karma bites!
Further, projecting high vibration energy at someone who is not ready for it may not be doing them any favors. There is a joke I use to illustrate the hazards of projecting light onto someone:
What is the worst, most terrible Chinese curse?
May you clear all of your karma by next week and become enlightened.
It is a curse because most people would not survive having all of their karma coming up in one week. The "growing pains" might overwhelm them. I know of one person who, with the best intentions, kept projecting unconditional love and light at a school principal who she felt was abusing her daughter. The man committed suicide.
To avoid this, make sure you do not send energy to someone without their consent.
There have been several "world peace" meditations that focused on projecting "love and light" on a particular country... and the long term result was that those countries got much worse. More violent, more unstable... Your blessing of "love and light" might be a bomb setting off more karma than someone can handle. A lot of the shrapnel is going to flow back to you as the cause. You are the one responsible for triggering the karma, and karma follows responsibility. I'm going to write that again, in bigger letters because it is very very important.
Karma follows responsibility.
If you are being God for someone by "fixing" them, then of course you will also get the karma. You are taking on responsibility for who they are and how they feel.
If you are making someone be God for you, by making them responsible for who you are and how you feel, using blame, guilt or judgment, then you are sending them your karma... you are cursing them. Blame is bombing others with your karma, and it is a form of black magic. Karma bites. It is also you giving your Divine power away... and the more you do it the more you will feel like a helpless victim.
Empowerment is "I attract, that which occurs." Realizing that you are God of your own life, what happens on the illusion of the external, is triggered, and a reflection of what is inside you. Change the world, by changing inside of yourself. Start with the person in the mirror.
Sometimes, bad things happen to good people, and good things happen to bad people. This paradigm does not mean to blame the victim. That would be another projection. Use it for self analysis. It does not mean that if bad things seem to be happening to you, it is because you are a bad person... we cannot see all the ripples of any event, to know what the true outcome will be.
"There is no such thing about a problem, without a gift for you in its hands. We seek problems because we need their gifts."
Richard Bach, "Illusions."
Responsibility, belongs to Goddess. Affirm that, every day and in every way, by surrender: "It will be as Goddess Wills." This is a prescription for peace. If Goddess really does want you to do something, (active surrender) She has all of reality to find a way to get the message across. Look for synchronicities coming in triplicate.
It is natural, compassionate to want to help others with your prayers and love. (It can be kind of lazy, too. Praying for the poor is not the same as opening a food bank.) The most effective, miraculous way to pray, is to simply affirm "Goddess has it handled" or "It will be as Goddess wills."
Keep your own ego ideas of what you think someone else needs, right out of the picture. Avoid projections, by sending energy vertically, instead of horizontally. Inwards instead of outwards.
Send the love up, to the Divine to deliver as Goddess thinks best. Vertically, through Spirit to rain down on them as their own Higher self thinks best, instead of horizontally like bullets of ego based "good intentions". Often, a simple affirmation of faith, like "Goddess has it handled" will result in awe inspiring miracles that free will ego consciousness could never arrange. "Goddess has it handled" is turning the situation over to a power and wisdom that your individual mind cannot even conceive of. It is the mustard seed that moves mountains. (If your faith is more than a mustard seed, then you know the mountain is perfect, right where it is.)
I sometimes refer to this as the Angelic courier service. People ask me for my blessings, I hand the blessings over to the Angels to adjust and alter as they think best, and to deliver at the most appropriate time. The most appropriate time, might be ten years from now... as Goddess wills. The funny thing about the angelic courier service, is that I have done energy work on people who received it *before* I did it. The energy went backwards in time. Love can do that, it transcends time and space.
It is never too late, to have a happy childhood.