The Guru.

Some assorted, rambling thoughts on the nature of the Guru-devotee relationship.

I do not like people to become dependent on me. I'd rather they depend on themselves, trust themselves.

When someone gives me their power, I get their karma too... responsibility is power, and karma follows responsibility. If they surrender, the transmutation is blissful, like nothing else... incredible miracles are possible. But if they resist it slays me.

The less I take responsibility for someone else's healing or growth, the less karma I take on from them. The more I take responsibility for someone's process, the more their karma flows to me. So, "Goddess has it handled" sends the karma to Goddess within the seeker, whereas "Mystress has it handled" sent the karma to me. I can process it, but sometimes it is a bumpy ride.

That is the guru game, turn your life over to the Guru, do as you are told and in exchange the Guru handles the karma. It has its advantages but in the long term it is hard on the Guru and dis-empowering for the seeker.

Surrender to the Guru is an absolute requirement, or you will kill the Guru... Free Will is Goddess law and trying to bend it has repercussions. The seekers resistance hurts the Guru. Even the great sage Ramana Maharishi, considered to be one of the greatest Gurus of all time, died of liver disease, and before he died he told his devotees that it was their karma that did it. Not fair of him to blame them, really. It was his taking on karma that they were not ready to surrender that does the damage... but in taking on responsibility in compassion, one cannot be choosy.

He is not the only one, liver and kidney problems are epidemic among Gurus who practice a hierarchical system. I am on a Kundalini Yoga list, Yogi Bahan has just had a kidney transplant. They were asking for prayers for him, for many months. How many thousands of devotees in 3HO, and all their karma flowing to him? Yikes!

To make an odd comparison, it is like what Jesus did... he kept preaching that the magic of miracles is in all of us, we are all God's children, he is not the only son of the Father... but as long as he was doing miracles for people, they saw God in him but not in themselves.

It is a fabulous rush to have someone surrender to me, to take on their karma and feel the blissful alchemy of it transmuting within myself... indescribable, miraculous and very addictive... but playing the game also gave me an emotionally chaotic life, being always pulled off balance processing emotions that were not my own.

It was dis-empowering to my devotees and seekers, too. They became dependent on me, and unwilling to take responsibility for their own process. Addicted to the game as I was. Attached to the miracles.

Humans are naturally hierarchical, as all herd creatures are... the dark side of it, is power struggles and conflict. The plus side of it is teamwork. Many joining together to accomplish more than one can do alone. Ants, geese, or the safety in numbers of a herd of zebras. One ox can pull 1000 pounds, but two oxen can pull 5000 pounds... but only if they are pulling in the same direction. ;) This is the power of miracles, "Where two or more are gathered in my name."

The Guru game is powerful. Effective... some days I kind of miss the power and the extravagant miracles, but most days I am happy to be sovereign in myself and teach others to be sovereign in themselves too... by surrendering to Goddess within themselves, not Goddess within me. Self realization makes ordinary things, sublime and miraculous.

The Guru Mystress game was intense... many of my devotees attained realization inside of 6 months, with me clearing their karma for them, but they were dependent, not able to sustain it on their own. They had not learned responsibility. Getting them to be independent and sovereign in themselves was really difficult. Trying to get them weaned... Why would they want to become toilet trained, if I am always there to change the diapers? A mother cat chases off her kittens with claws and teeth, when it is time for them to be independent. A few felt my claws when their dependence became resistance, too heavy for me to bear.

With a few, because the karma for their actions flowed to me, they did not believe they had power, and so were reckless in their energy and projections. I owned them, so what they put out came back to me, multiplied, and I got so thrashed I had to cut them loose so they would learn from their own mistakes. Get the karmic feedback from their actions directly, so they could learn that they had power, and that with power comes responsibility.

I'm not complaining, they were educational... :) The key for me, is to not take responsibility or allow anyone to become dependent on me, in the first place. Give the power back as fast as it is projected. Within a session, I may play Guru for that time. At the end of the session, any karma I have taken on that has not been processed within that time, returns to the client, As Goddess thinks best. Goddess may choose to return it to them, as insights or spiritual gifts... that is not up to me. Before I started doing that, I was not making a clear disconnection from my clients, and sometimes their karma continued to flow to me for three days, to a week. Their thoughts and feelings, in me. I prefer to have a silent mind.

With my FST students, I am willing to give them attention for the first 1/3 of the course, but after that I want them to look within for their answers. Trust themselves, more than me. Of course, if they have questions during the latter part of the course, I will still support them, but often it means reflecting their questions back to them, so they can see themselves more clearly.

I have a deal with Goddess, the course belongs to Her, She is responsible for my students progress, and the result is the students karma flows to Her, directly. It also creates some amazing synchronicity effects that I am delighted to observe, but take no responsibility for. Goddess did it. Humility serves me better than a pedestal ever did. Amazing Grace...

Try an experiment, watch one of the FST videos and try to project onto me... savior, villain, anything... it does not stick. I'm glad of that... glad to no longer be a slave to the chaos of other people's karma processing through me. Peace is my reward.

It is like gardening. I can plant the seed, and water it, but Goddess makes the flowers grow. Don't call me a Guru, I'm just Mystress.